Tag Archives: violence

Can We Take the Life Apart?

I’m going to retread a little territory here because it’s been on my mind and what else is a blog good for if not to document how one’s thought processes evolve over time? Call it the Chris Brown Question for contemporary relevance, but it could equally be the Roman Polanski Problem, or the Pablo Picasso Predicament. That is, how do we reconcile professional respect or appreciation (Who doesn’t like Les Demoiselles d’Avignon?) without condoning some horrifying and harmful behaviors?

I just finished Ann Patchett’s novel State of Wonder, about a team of researchers investigating ethically controversial new pharmaceuticals in the Amazon basin. A husband and wife duo have an argument about a well-regarded scientist who was also a chronic philanderer:

Nancy: “I’m not saying people don’t have affairs, even very decent people, let us be so lucky as to fall into that category. But we cannot unbraid the story of another person’s life and take out all the parts that don’t suit our purposes and put forth only the ones that do. He was a great scientist, I will grant you that, and by all accounts a true charismatic, but he was also deeply unfaithful to two women and frankly that bothers me. It bothers me that the man you say you wanted to become was a lifelong philanderer.”

Alan: “We can take the life apart. We do it all the time. Picasso put out cigarettes on his girlfriends and we don’t love the paintings any less for it. Wagner was a fascist and I can hum you every bar in the opening of Die Walkure.

Les_Demoiselles_d'AvignonThis argument doesn’t quite capture the Chris Brown Question because infidelity, while personally painful, is not high on my list of “bad behaviors.” Compared to, say, beating your girlfriend, raping a 13-year-old, or putting out cigarettes on humans, it’s pretty mundane. That said, the language of this passage helps articulate how I think about this stuff.

There’s the bad behavior that makes one a lousy role model (infidelity, selfishness, etc) and then there’s the Bad Behavior that makes you a shitty human (abusing people, sex crimes, etc). Does that distinction hold up? I don’t know… abuse and violence stem from someplace…and where does redemption and rehabilitation fit in? Bah. Pesky humans and their complicated psyches!

And if you’re someone in that second category, the capital-B category, can I really appreciate your art/music/writing as separate from the Bad Behavior? I don’t know.

This has not been a productive post because I have no answers. What do you think? If you stop dancing when Chris Brown comes on at the club, do you also walk by the Picasso room at the art museum?

Related Post: Can I listen to Chris Brown with a clear conscience?

Related Post: Dove, pioneer or panderer?

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The Best Things I Read on the Internet, 2012

Like last year, I’m doing a Best Things I read on the Internet list. This is obviously in no way complete or comprehensive, it is merely a tiny slice of the internet that I really enjoyed and I hope you enjoy too.

  • How to Slowly Kill Yourself and Others in AmericaGawker (Kiese Laymon): I’ve read this essay about violence and race and home and promise so many times. There are phrases I’m sure will stick with me forever, “I’m a waste of writing’s time,” and “I wish I could get my Yoda on right now and surmise all this shit into a clean sociopolitical pull-quote that shows supreme knowledge and absolute emotional transformation, but I don’t want to lie.”
  • “Can You Call a 9-Year-Old a Sociopath?”New York Times (Jennifer Kahn): In the wake of Sandy Hook, this investigation of psychopathy in children hits particularly hard. How early can you identify the traits of psychopathy, and what do you do about it?
  • “Expectations”The New Yorker (Katherine Boo): This is the story of the uneasy relationship between an aspiring politician, Michael Bennet, and a high school on the edge of disfunction (or maybe over it?) in Denver. We talk about turnaround schools, benchmarks, races to the top, but what does that actually look like reflected back in the faces of teenagers?
  • “The Last Tower”Harpers (Ben Austen) – For you Chicagoans, or those who wish to be Chicagoans, the towers of Cabrini-Green hold a particular and problematic place in our recent history. I walk by the remains of them every day. How did they start? Where they wrong from the beginning? Could they have been saved? Should they have been saved?
  • “Transformation and Transcendance: The Power of Female Friendship”The Rumpus (Emily Rapp): I hate, hate, hate the title of this essay if only because of how many potential readers might be turned off by it’s hippie-dippy enlightenment vibe. It’s so amazing and fantastic that I want every single person to read it. This was the first thing I ever read of Rapp’s, and I’ve been hooked since.
  • “Click and Drag”xkcd (Randall Munroe): This isn’t an essay, per se, but I find it profound and delightful nonetheless. In an interactive cartoon, “Click and Drag” is about finding small pleasures, and remembering how much of the world there always is to explore.
  • “Odd Blood: Serodiscordancy, or, Life with an HIV-Positive Partner” - The Atlantic (John Fram): A piece of the HIV puzzle we don’t see exposed very often, “Odd Blood” is a lyrically written account of a relationship in which one partner is HIV-positive and the other is not.

Part 2 coming later this week!

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Sunday Scraps 85

sunday85

1. SPORTS: This Charles Siebert piece for the New York Times Magazine about the rigors and stresses of trying to make an NFL team is fascinating. How much do you want it? And how much are you willing to take to get it?

2. BOOKS: Super great Atlantic essay about author Ann Patchett (Bel Canto, State of Play) and her new bookstore in Nashville. As a lover of independent bookstores, I think this is all kinds of awesome.

3. CHRIS BROWN: After violent exchange with a female comedian on Twitter, Chris Brown deleted his account. The always excellent Roxane Gay on why criticizing Brown isn’t racist, and why it also is pretty f’ing complicated.

4. ELECTION: Curious about how all those Obama for America emails with subject lines like “Hey” or “It’s officially over” played out? Businessweek has some answers.

5. PAIN: There’s an extremely rare medical condition where you feel no pain. Sounds great, right? Not unless you step on a nail, scratch yourself bloody, or break an ankle and don’t realize it. The New York Times has an examination.

6. MEDIA: The Geena Davis Institute on Gender in Media has put together an excellent report about the representation of women on screen (especially on children and family programming) and Mother Jones has a summary of some of the most telling facts and figures.

Related Post: Sunday 84 – Letters from astronauts, the female male model, bedrooms around the world.

Related Post: Sunday 83 – Hillary Clinton’s next move, Denver public schools, Mormons on the Romney bus

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Monday Scraps 83

1. GIFTS: After Romney’s post-election definition-of-a-sore-loser quotes about the “gifts” the President gave young people and minorities (Did you know you can buy a 24-year-old’s vote for a couple of months of contraception. TRUE FACT), Jon Stewart shared a few other “gifts.”

2. MORMON: Super excellent piece by McKay Coppins for BuzzFeed on being the sole Mormon reporter on the Romney press bus.

3. MEXICO: What happens to journalism when bribery, threats, and frequent spates of violence directed specifically at the press plague your country? Just ask reporters covering Mexico’s drug wars (NYT Book Review).

4. LANGUAGE: Which words does the NYT use too often? A new internal tool lets the paper (and curious spectators) explore the patterns of language perpetuated and created.

5. HILLARY: Gail Collins + Hillary Clinton = excellent reading. What will Hillary do next? Sleep, aparently, and exercise.

6. DENVER: This is from 2007, but I’m kind of obsessed with Katherine Boo this week, so I’m sharing it anyway. For the New Yorker, she covers the story of Denver’s superintendent and the journey of one turnaround school that couldn’t quite turnaround.

Related Post: Sunday 82: Kevin Durant and the OKC, Rachel Maddow nails it, cute MD photos

Related Post: Sunday 81: Callie Khouri, Anita Sarkeesian, sex surrogacy

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An Ounce of Prevention….

Via Chicagoist

Yesterday, Chicago Mayor Rahm Emanuel announced that the city would be receiving federal assistance in violence reduction efforts. Chicago’s murder rate is up 31% this year and in an 8 day period last month, 82 people were killed or injured by gun violence. Here’s his quote about incorporating federal agencies into the city’s strategy to reduce these appalling numbers:

“These agencies have been incredible partners, and this decision shows their continued commitment to help expand successful crime reduction strategies here. These new efforts will help us make a larger impact in our work to keep gangs, guns and drugs off the streets.”

I know that this is a sound byte, and I know that due to our dwindling attention spans, statements like this are all we really expect from our politicians, but I want more. The language here bugs me, when I really parse it out:

“…our work to keep gangs, guns and drugs off the streets”

First, this phrasing gives no thought to the origins of said gangs, guns and drugs. It treats them as autonomous objects, sprung fully formed from the South and West Sides, instead of products of historic (and contemporary, in some cases) discrimination and systemic failure. Gangs do not spring up arbitrarily, they exist in communities and areas where there’s a vacuum of other community structures and standards. In most of these neighborhoods, the unemployment rate hovers between 40 and 50%.

Second, “keeping them off the streets” implies that making our issues less visible, less accessible, is progress. If you remove them from “the streets,” will be deposited elsewhere? If our problems are less visible on the “streets” are they less problematic? If you sweep dirt under a rug, is your house any cleaner?

Third, and my overarching issue here, is that this strategy addresses symptoms instead of root causes (poverty, inequality, lack of access to health care, education, safety). To be clear, the violence is an immediate problem that needs to be addressed now, for damn sure. But, the fact that we’ve reached a point when we have to invite federal agencies to stop the bleeding means we have failed, for decades now, to adequately address the causes of violence. We should be embarrassed. Call in the feds for a few weeks, police the streets, arrest some people, confiscate guns, impose a curfew, do what you will to make next month’s murder numbers look better than this month’s. But then what? Short term improvement on our violence statistics does nothing when you haven’t addressed why shit got bad in the first place.

I know what you’re saying. You’re saying, Rahm knows all this, he’s a pretty smart guy. You’re saying, it’s just a sound byte, it’s his “ten-word answer” (for you West Wing fans). You’d be right, but I don’t want a ten-word answer and I don’t want “Keep the gangs, guns and drugs off our streets” to substitute for a comprehensive, comprehensive set of initiatives aimed at the fundamental inequalities that leave people stranded with few resources and no reason to hope for more. I know, I know, I want too much. Ten words is all most of us will read anyway.

Related Post: There goes the neighborhood

Related Post: Chicago Maptastic

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Monday Scraps 69

1. AMERICANA: Max Fisher at The Atlantic interviews new visitors to the U.S. about what surprises them most. Grocery stores and nursing homes, apparently.

2. RACE: If you read one thing on this list (but I hope you read it all), read Kiese Laymon’s essay “How to Slowly Kill Yourself and Others in America” about race, racism, violence, Mississippi, and 8,000 other things. Content aside, the prose will bowl you over (Gawker).

3. FRIENDS: I love love love this Roxane Gay list of tips on being friends with another woman: 7A: Don’t be totally rude about truth telling and consider how much truth is actually needed to get the job done. Finesse goes a long way. 7B: These conversations are more fun when preceded by an emphatic, ‘GIRL.’”

4. BIKINI: The internet is a strange place. Exhibit A: Matchbook, which pairs bikinis with beach reading by literally matching the pattern of a bikini and the cover a book…

5. WRITING: Chicago writer Megan Stielstra in a lovely essay on finding, or not finding, a room of one’s own in which to work (The Rumpus).

6. OLYMPICS: Divers’ faces while diving. You’re welcome.

Related Post: Sunday 68: Your twenties, POV of a condom, Jason Alexander, Hope Solo.

Related Post: Sunday 67: Lego The Wire, Caterina Fake, models without makeup

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We Have to Go Deeper Than Gun Control

I grew up with a psychologist for a father. From a very early age, we heard stories about mental illness and substance abuse (the overlapping occurrence of which was his specialty) at the dinner table.

We learned early on to think about mental health treatment as a toolbox, a long list of therapies, programs, medications, incentives, and support mechanisms that seeks to ease the burden of mental illness even when it can’t eradicate it. Psychology and psychiatry were never viewed as magic pills or a perfect solutions, only as the best bets for improving the quality of life of people who were suffering.

In the wake of James Holmes’ killing spree in Aurora, I saw this cartoon, and I thought about my dad. He has worked with many violent people over the years. People who made threats to themselves, their families, even to their therapists.

Cartoon by Nick Anderson (The Houston Chronicle)

Mentally stable people don’t murder a dozen movie-goers. That seems obvious, but much of the post-Aurora conversation has been centered around gun control and how Holmes’ crimes could have been prevented with better gun laws.

I do absolutely believe in restricting gun access in about a zillion different ways, but we’re deluding ourselves if we think that the James Holmeses of the world wouldn’t find other ways to carry out their plans. Gun control is addressing one very small slice of the problem, a problem whose roots, in my opinion, begin with mental health.

And David Brooks agrees with me, so I must be on the right track:

Looking at guns, looking at video games — that’s starting from the wrong perspective. People who commit spree killings are usually suffering from severe mental disorders. The response, and the way to prevent future episodes, has to start with psychiatry, too.

Yes, we need to limit guns. Yes, we need to make it as hard as possible for the wrong people to get them. But much like getting guns of the streets of Chicago doesn’t solve deeply ingrained sociological inequalities, limiting gun access doesn’t undo years of untreated mental illness and psychological distress. If we believe that healthy, stable people with options don’t seek to commit violence (which I do), the we have to be addressing the causes of instability, not the tools with which people express their outrage and frustration.

Related Post: How I defunkify myself when I’m feeling funky.

Related Post: My thoughts on some of Chicago’s violence issues.

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Guest Post: A “ScandinAsian” on Oslo Attacks and U.S. Media Coverage

Remember last week when I pretended to be a food blogger on The Nom Blog and I told you about Anna and our Bertucci’s bonding? Today, Anna’s returning the favor with a guest post for Rosie Says. Here she is:

I’ve never written anything about news prior to this guest post; I’ve stayed relatively close to subjects such as food, entertainment and technology. I want to share some of my thoughts and reactions to the recent terrorist attacks in Norway. For those of you who don’t know me, I am half Korean and half Norwegian, a “ScandinAsian” if you will. I grew up speaking both English and Norwegian and spent the majority of my summers visiting family and friends in Norway. This past May I graduated from the University of Wisconsin-Madison and, instead of attending the usual summer family trip to Scandinavia, I traveled to Greece, France and Spain on my own.

Sometime in the afternoon of July 22, I was preparing to visit a museum in Madrid, Spain when I received a text message from my brother asking, “Did you hear about the bombings in Oslo?” I remember feeling my throat sink deep into my stomach as I frantically searched “Oslo bombings” and “attack in Oslo” on Google with few results. The only news source that offered any sort of information was the UK Huffington Post, and even that was limited in its account of the bombing. Facebook was no more helpful. I watched in horror as photos and confused status updates surfaced on my newsfeed. After 9/11, this was the second time in my life where I found myself staring in disbelief at a billowing cloud of smoke and at a screen that offered no answers to my questions.

In the aftermath of the two attacks, Anders Behring Breivik, a white, conservative Christian Norwegian, was taken into custody for the bombing of the Norwegian parliament in Oslo and massacre of a Labor Party camp on the island of Utøya, leaving 77 dead.

I was very hard for me to grasp how and why this tragedy took place in such a peaceful country. It’s difficult to comprehend how a man who murdered dozens of innocent men, women, teenagers and children could only get away with a 21-year sentence. But what’s remarkable is that amidst a time of great sadness, Norwegians stood together and did not give in to the assailant’s desired attention; I remember reading someone’s Facebook status that read, Fokus på ofrene og berørte av terroren Utøya og Oslo, IKKE gjerningsmannen [Focus on the victims and those affected by the terrors on Utoya and Oslo, NOT on the perpetrator].

However, one thing I struggled with was the news and media coverage of these attacks, or lack thereof. In the wake of the Day of Mourning and as the number of missing persons began to dwindle, the international news coverage quickly faded. No longer was Norway’s crisis under investigation or concern to the rest of the world [so it seemed]. I am saddened particularly because none of the stories of survival or eyewitness accounts will ever move beyond the boundaries of Norway.* None of the problems involving lack of police and delayed emergency response will be revealed to prevent future problems, not to the outside world at least.

Recently, on August 21, Norway ended a month-long period of mourning with a ceremony in Oslo. It was at this time where media starting buzzing again about the attacks. What about the month inbetween? I rely (ied) mostly on Norwegian news sources like Aftenposten an Dagbladet to keep myself informed over the trial proceedings, mourning families and any other information pertaining to the investigation of the attacks. But what about other readers? What about other nations that harbor extremists who plan (have plotted) attacks?

I guess this is the first time I am realizing that this is a problem from a bilingual point of view. Sure, our (U.S.) news coverage system isn’t perfect, let’s face it, no system is, but that doesn’t mean it can’t be remedied. And at a time where countries are becoming more introverted, and our education systems cut language programs, our translations suffer. I’m not saying that we’re not doing a good job at covering news; I’m saying that, in this particular case, there was an abrupt end with no follow up.

 *For English speakers, Anna has provided a few articles and a video that “despite iffy translations, are particularly well-written and eye-opening for those who have not read past news and media headlines.”

VIDEO: Norway’s Month of Mourning Ends

Couple braved gunfire to rescue 40 in water at Utoya

Norway Shooting: German tourist hailed a hero after saving 30 lives

Norway Bombing Reaction: Oslo Tragedy Prompts Outpouring Of Reaction From World Leaders (PHOTOS)

Chilling Text Exchange Provides Window to Norway Terror

“Multi-Culturalsim Is Dead:” Norway’s Lesson to the World

Related Post: Gail Collins on the U.S. Tucson shootings.

Related Post: College football and condoning violence.


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Sunday Scraps 17

1.BODY/MEDICINE: The American Medical Association is officially putting photoshop on the shit list, “We must stop exposing impressionable children and teenagers to advertisements portraying models with body types only attainable with the help of photo editing software.”

2. MONOGAMY: Dan Savage and his controversial (but refreshingly rational) views on monogamy are profiled by Mark Oppenheimer for the New York Times.

3. WORDS: Katie “Jordan” Price is a British tabloid star (think Paris Hilton with giant boobs). This letter she wrote about her disabled son is powerful, eloquent, and totally surprising. Color me embarrassed for judging the book by its silicone cover.

4. GAY/MONEY: Slate‘s June Thomas profiles the interesting economic challenges of running a gay bar. How do you run a business when you cater to only 10% of the population?

5. WORK: Mike Rowe hosts “Dirty Jobs,” that show about farmers castrating pigs and oil rig employees. His TED Talk about his changing views on the nature of “work” is really good (and not only because he’s damn sexy).

6. TRAUMA: The internet went a bit bonkers this week over Mac Mclelland’s explosive personal essay, “How Violent Sex Helped Ease my PTSD,” about her experiences reporting from Haiti and overcoming the subsequent trauma. Other journalists called foul, accusing McClelland of narcissism and trivializing the real victims. This letter against the piece was signed by a laundry list of activists and writers, including Haitian writer Edwidge Danticat.

Related Post: Last Sunday, we talked about favorite lesbians, two Jo(h)ns, and the negotiating table.

Related Post: The Sunday before included gender in comic books, “Fat,” and raunchy language on the baseball diamond.

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The Most Creative Way I Ever Missed a Flight

I promised a story of the missed flight and never delivered.

It was 6am and I was standing on the platform waiting for the brown line. I had miscalculated my travel time, and I was staring at the Sunday schedule kicking myself and strategizing how to get to the airport without forking over $40. As I count backwards from 8:30, I strike up a conversation with the only other person who thinks that trains run this early on a Sunday. He looks like this:I manage to engage with this strange man enough that I simultaneously realize two things: 1) I need to leave the platform RIGHT NOW if I want to get a cab to the airport and make my flight, and 2) my platform buddy was an actor in the 70s and did a couple of movies with Alfred Hitchcock.

Sane people know that the obvious choice here is to politely say “nice to meet you,” back away slowly, and hop in a cab. I do not do this. Instead, I say, “What was Hitchcock like?” and kiss any chance of catching my plane goodbye.

What happened next was that Ken Kincaid, as I learned he was called, and I spent 25 minutes talking about his life working on Western movies and TV series’. He was in Cheyenne Autumn, Fire in the Sky and Springfield Rifle. Turns out Alfred Hitchcock was “a short, fat, weird little bird of a man.” Ken told me that Hitchcock hated the movies, a declaration I didn’t believe. “Oh yeah,” he said, “I asked him once, I said, ‘Mr. Hitchock, why’d you spend your whole life making movies if you hate them?’ and he said to me, ‘If I direct the movies I can show people how terrible they are.’”

I asked Ken how he arrived in Chicago. It was 1987, he said, and he had a role in John Wayne’s last movie. He forfeited the role to come to Chicago and take care of his sister who had emphysema. Did I know the Jewel-Osco on Broadway and Berwyn? I told him I did. He said, “well, I was walking to the store that was up there to get somethings for my sister, and a man stepped out of a bar holding a 38-gauge shotgun. He said to me, he said, ‘I have something for you, cowboy’ and shot me in the stomach. I woke up from the coma 5 weeks later missing a piece of my stomach and one lung.” And that’s how he wound up in Chicago.*

A train is rumbling up. We both get on. I ask Ken where he’s headed. The flea market on Roosevelt, obviously. He buys beads and pendants to make jewelry, obviously. He shows me a bracelet he made. I notice a “L-O-V-E” tattoo on his knuckles where the old blue ink has spread and blurred the letters. He gets off one stop later, shaking my hand goodbye.

This conversation cost me four hours of travel time. I called to apologize to my dad for missing the flight and cutting into our afternoon together. True to form, he replied “Don’t be sorry! Just another one of life’s adventures!” In other words, the apple doesn’t fall from the tree.

*When I reconnected with the internet a million hours of travel later, I confirmed Ken’s stories. He even speaks on the dangers of gun violence.

Related Post: Other fun things that happen when you return to Massachusetts. Also involves guns!

Related Post: My dad is awesome. I wrote a whole article about him for the Good Men Project.

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