Djinns in Delhi and Other Associations

I wrote my college essay about books, obviously. I don’t know where it is now, hopefully on a floppy disc or yellowing in a folder somewhere, but I remember that it was about the intersection of my memories with what I was reading at any given moment. I tend to remember vacations by the book that accompanied me to the beach, or momentous life events by the book in which I looked for comfort or joy while they unfolded around me.

Books and travel are inextricably linked in my memories. The sights and sounds and tastes of a particular place get trapped in the pages of whatever I was reading at the time, such that spotting its spine on my shelf or cracking the covers is enough to bring on some crazy strong nostalgia waves. Sometimes I read with a sense of geographic purpose–City of Djinns in Delhi, for example, or Turn Right at Machu Picchu in Cusco–, but usually it’s not that obvious.

I bought Alice Munro’s Runaway in a bookstore in Trivandrum, India, because I was a handful of pages away from finishing something else, and being bookless always sparks in me some serious anxiety. I found a bar/book swap in Madrid once, and I picked the high-brow Yiddish Policeman’s Union and the low-brow 4 Blondes to enjoy through the rest of Spain. The Hefner biography Mr. Playboy will always be tied to the cruise ship on which I read it, somewhere between Fort Lauderdale and Jamaica.

By now, you know by now how much I like maps, right?

Click to enlarge

Click to enlarge

So I made a map. I did as much as I could from memory, which was about 85% of it, and then I used the book list I’ve been keeping for 13 years to do the rest. It’s not “complete” in any technical sense, but it was a fun exercise. I remembered that I read Outliers in an ashram in Kerala, of all places. I remembered that I brought only chick lit to Israel so that I wouldn’t feel bad about leaving it there. I remembered crying over Never Let Me Go on a plane from Berlin to London when I realized what was going to happen. You might think that diving into a book might pull me out of whatever I’m actually experiencing, but somehow it only serves to make it all the richer.

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Sunday Scraps 102

sunday102

1. JOURNALISM: This my be my favorite editorial I’ve read in quite some time. From Tim Krieder at the NYT, he writes about uncertainty of stating one’s opinions on the internet: “I felt like the explanatory caption beneath my name on-screen ought to be: PERSON IN WORLD.” This is basically exactly how I feel about everything.

2. STYLE: Ever wonder about Rihanna’s hairstylist? Who is this person? Where did he or she come from? NYMag has got you covered.

3. WAR: In this not at all scientific but very strangely powerful series, soldiers are photographed before, during, and after war.

4. TELEVISION: How to make a good drama that wins lots of awards. Is there a formula for that? Perchance there is and it’s only 13 steps!

5. GEOGRAPHY: Highly difficult, highly addictive, Geoguessr is game where google streetview displays a picture and you try to guess where in the world it was taken. Good luck with Australia vs. Texas.

6. DEPRESSION: Blogger Allie Brosh is back after a long hiatus. This webcomic explains where she’s been, and also does a pretty excellent job at describing depression to those that are not depressed. Play close attention to the fish analogy.

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Filed under Art, Gender, Hollywood, Media, Really Good Writing by Other People

Personal is Political

Wouldn’t it be cool to be the person who made up the phrase “The personal is political?” No one knows who came up with it, though it was popularized in 1970 by a Carol Hanisch essay. Gloria Steinem once said that trying to find the originator of the phrase would be like trying to figure out who first called it “World War II.” Oh Gloria, so witty!

This week for Role/Reboot I wrote about the relationship I see between personal decisions and political ramifications. Or, sometimes, between political action and the resulting personal choices. It goes both ways.

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Filed under Gender, Politics, Republished!

Lady Art

I’ve noticed a pattern. Now that I’ve noticed I can’t unnotice it, so I might as well embrace it. I like to buy art when I travel because it feels more substantial than jewelry (which I’ll lose), coffee (which I’ll drink), trinkets (which I have no use for and will eventually toss the next time I move), and clothing (which I will probably stain/shrink/rip).

Here’s my new wall hanging from Cusco:

IMG_2910You see this image everywhere in Cusco, the backs of female heads. Sometimes it’s more literal as they sit in a circle, the goings on of which we are not privy to, sometimes it’s more abstract, like my pattern. They’re backs are to us, because what they’re doing is not for us, the viewer, the outsider; it’s for themselves. They call it “la chismosa,” which means “the gossiping.” I loved it immediately.

So I bring this thing home and start looking for a place to hang it, and that’s when I notice this…

IMG_2909And this

IMG_2908And this

IMG_2907And this

IMG_2906The vast, vast majority of my art is depictions of women. I’m fascinated by the ways that different cultures and communities and artists choose to represent them (One of the many reason I use the Rosie icon for this blog). Have you ever seen that stat about how much of the art in major museums is by women (very little), how much of it is of women (a bit more) and how many of the naked people are ladies (a whopping 85%).

Not all of my art is created by women (though much of it is), but the common thread (if you can find one besides gender of the subjects) is that I like images of women that push back on the idea that they are objects against which someone else can project intent (lust, desire, protection, etc). La Chismosa is amazing because it’s such a desexualized (without being ungendered) way to portray women as having relationships completely separate from their interaction with men.

The flapper, the “garden buddha,” the image of Radha and Krishna (bought in Chennai, India), there’s a self-contained agency about these women. They are not waiting for the actions or reactions of anyone else. I didn’t pick them for that reason on purpose, but when they’re all lined up, it seems so obvious.

Now that I’ve noticed it, I should probably stick with the trend, don’t you think? Where to next, and what should I bring back?

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A Couple, a Cab Driver, a Pharmacist, a Banker, and Two Spanish Teachers

IMG_3343I’m back. Photos and stories, tips and tricks, will come later. First, a thank you note:

Dear Anonymous American Couple on Your Honeymoon,

When you met me, in an airport in Lima, Peru, I was clearly trying to contain my panic. I’d just landed after 10 hours in the airspace of nine countries, and I couldn’t find my wallet.  The airline claimed they didn’t have it and it wasn’t in the seatback pocket or under the cushion or in any of the obvious places. It was gone. I asked to borrow your phone, and you told me you didn’t have one, but asked me why. I shakily explained, forcing the tears out of my voice and creating a false cheerinees, a jaunty, “oh, you know how these things go” positivity. In my head, I had already resorted to sleeping in the airport. Instead, you asked me how much money I needed and handed me $100 to get me to a hostel and to find me some dinner.

Dear Marcelo the Taxi Driver,

When you picked me up at the airport, I explained to you in rather shaky high school Spanish (lots of unconjugated verbs and a tendency to repeat “entonces,” and “pues,”) that I had lost my wallet on the way here. You asked if I had called my mom, which I hadn’t. You offered your phone, insisting I call whomever I needed. “But it’s international,…” I said, and you just waved away my concerns. I reached my mother in Florida and explained the situation. She promised to figure out how to wire money across continents and assured me it would be fine. Sir, the cab fare was only $11, and had I had any more money than the kind couple had given me, I hope you know I would have tipped you better.

Dear Eleri, My New Friend and Moral Support,

Over coca tea and bread and jam in the tiny kitchen of our hostel, we started chatting. After explaining the bind I’d gotten myself into, you offered to accompany me to the bank–”for moral support,” you said–where I was going to try to secure some sort of emergency cash or limited access to my funds, anything to enable me to continue on my trip. During the walk, we talked about your work as a pharmacist, your adventures through South America, and the kind of world we both wanted to travel in. At the bank, you waited patiently with me for over an hour while I negotiated paperwork and red tape. “It would be hard to do this kind of thing alone,” you said, and you were right.

Dear Miguel, the Most Patient Banker Alive,

When I walked into your office explaining my “emergencia,” and asking for “ayuda,” you did not roll your eyes at the silly American. You did not tell me that it was Saturday morning and the bank would be closing soon. You did not tell me that on the weekend what I was asking was next to impossible. You picked up the phone and made some calls. And then more calls. And then some faxes. You filled out form after form, helped me answer security question after security question. Most importantly, you kept smiling at me and assuring me that it would all work out. You told me sometimes it can take hours, and when I told you my next flight left in less than three, you made it happen. I walked out of your office with my money safely tucked into three separate locations and the first easy breath I’d taken in 12 hours.

Dear Senoras Huff and Woodward,

You two are the most memorable Spanish teachers I had, 12 and 10 years ago, respectively. While practicing irregular verbs or memorizing airport vocabulary, it never occurred to me how essential your training might ever be. There is not a chance in hell I would have successfully walked out of that bank without the conversational Spanish I learned in your classrooms. My facility with the language is halting these days, rusty and gooey from lack of use, but man, the fundamentals are strong. There’s a particular kind of confidence that comes from knowing you can understand and make yourself understood in another tongue. It’s not a skill on which we Americans place a lot of value, but I find it infinitely easier to show a little linguistic humility than to slam my American passport on a counter and start issuing demands.

Dear Family of Mine,

You are all pretty awesome. You sent encouraging emails. You provided financial and emotional assistance. You followed up. You checked in. More than any of that, though, you imbued in me through direction and example the kind of calm in the face of calamity that allowed me to figure my way out of this particular tight spot. Mom, Dad, I have seen you both navigate emergencies with grace under fire and solve problems with charm and ingenuity. From you I learned that lesson #1 is Don’t Panic. Lesson #2 is Seriously, Don’t Panic, It Will All Be Fine. That’s a certain kind of desperate optimism that I don’t have to call on very often, but when I do, I’m glad I’ve got such an example.

Thanks a bunch, you guys, it was a GREAT trip,

Love

Emily

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So I´m on vacation…but…

So I´m on vacation. I should not be blogging. I should be out seeing and doing and drinking and eating. Except, I did all of those things for a while today and now I´m pooped. Quizas una siesta pequena y despues mas aventuras.

I love traveling alone for a number of reasons to be explained at some other time, but one of the challenges is that all of my brilliant observations go unnoticed. If a thought is had in the forest but no one is there to hear it, was it really as insightful as I thought it was? Por ejemplo, I just finished Mark Adams´travelogue Turn Right at Machu Picchu about his own trek through Inca country, the history of the empire (which reached 10 million people at its height) and the ´discoverer´ of Machu Picchu, Hiram Bingham.

Do you know what I underlined throughout the book? The ladies. Oh my God, the ladies. You are all rolling your eyes right now, like….duh, Emily is all about the womens, but seriously you guys, it was like half a book was missing. It´s not Adams´ fault, history is written by the winners as we all know, and winning, in all of its measurable forms (think elected seats, published articles, coronations, etc) has been traditionally male. But there were at least half a dozen times throughout the book where a woman was mentioned in passing, and I was like, Wait, Mark, don´t stop now, what´s her story?? Por ejemplo,

  • Annie S. Peck – She was a mountaineer in the early 1900s who was ostenisbly racing Hiram Bingham to the top of record breaking South American peaks. This is 1912 we´re talking about here.  She also got a masters from University of Michigan in Greek in 1881. She became known not for scaling Matterhorn, but because she wore pants while doing it. When she got to the top of Mt. Coropuna, she planted a flag that said ¨Women´s Vote.¨ How have I never heard of this chick?

    peck

    Annie Peck

  • Cura Occlo – She was the wife (and sister) of Manco Inca. She was captured by Gonzalo Pizarro (allegedly the nastiest of the conquistadores). When Manco rebelled against the Spanish (he was the puppet kin), he steals Cura back and they escape into the jungle from whence they battled the Spanish for years. All does not end well for Cura, however, she was captured again in 1539, raped and tortured, and finally executed in a public square before her body was sent to Manco via basket down the river (or so says the legend).
  • Dona Angelina Yupanqui - She was the child pride of Atahualpa, the Inca king killed by the Spanish after the most famous failed ransom attempt of all time. She became the mistress of Pizarro (by choice? doubtful, who knows…) and bore him two sons. When he was killed, she married Juan de Batanzos, who wrote the early classic Narrative of the Incas.
  • Alfreda Bingham – Hiram´s wife´s fortune bankrolled most of his adventures. From Hiram´s letters to her, it was clear that he confided in her about his exploratory insecurities. After raising seven sons while he was off adventuring (wonder how she felt about that…), they divorced in 1937. She eventually remarried a composer.

I want a biography apiece on each of these ladies. Pronto! Seriously though, they each get a few footnoted mentions in the biographies of their male contemporaries, but there are clearly volumes that could be written on each of them.

Off to the Inca Trail tomorrow. Stay safe and wish me luck!

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Filed under Books, Gender, Uncategorized

What if instead of work trips to golf courses, we had yoga retreats?

My  new piece for Role/Reboot is about gender and the workplace. I work in tech, as you know, and there’s this phenomenon that I call the “treehouse mentality.” It’s basically like the old boy’s club, except replace brandy and cigars with video games and porn. It’s more juvenile, but it’s the same idea.

I kind of get it; for a while, tech has been this secret space of very smart, very nerdy dudes. Because they were so isolated, they were able to create a work environment that suited them perfectly. Now the treehouse is being invaded by girls (though not as fast as we might like) and they’re pointing at all the pictures of boobs on the wall and being all like, “Yo, guys, you’ve got to get rid of this shit.”

Screenshot_5_2_13_5_38_PM-2

On one hand, I understand; their secret space is being invaded. On the other hand, well, it was all theirs for a while, now it’s time to grow up and open the gates.

I was inspired by a great Bob Martin essay on the software company 8th Light’s blog called “There Are Ladies Present.” He writes about trying, and at first failing, to welcome women to the tech industry. He errs on the side of treating them too daintily, which they don’t like, and this essay is his exploration of where the lines fall:

Have we created a locker room environment in the software industry? Has it been male dominated for so long that we’ve turned it into a place where men relax and tell fart and dick jokes amongst themselves to tickle their pre-pubescent personas? When we male programmers are together, do we feel like we’re in a private place where we can drop the rules, pretenses, and manners?

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Filed under Gender, Republished!